At 78 years of age, Wally married Anne, a lovely 25 year old. Since her new husband is so old, Anne decides that after their wedding she and Wally should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together. After the wedding festivities Anne prepares herself for bed and the expected 'knock' on the door.Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Wally, her 78 year old groom, ready for action.They unite as one.All goes well, Wally takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep.After a few minutes, Anne hears another knock on her bedroom door, and it's Wally. Again he is ready for more 'action.' Somewhat surprised, Anne consents for more coupling. When the newlyweds are done,Wally kisses his bride,bids her a fond goodnight and leaves. She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha you guessed it....Wally is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more 'action.' And, once again they enjoy each other.But as Wally gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, ''I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover,Wally.'' Wally, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Anne and says,''You mean I was here already?''
The moral of the story: Don't be afraid of getting old, senior moments have advantages.
(note by Alex - I've never been afraid of getting older - it beats the alternative)
A nurse on the pediatric ward, before listening to the little ones' chests, would plug the stethoscope into their ears and let them listen to their own heart. Their eyes would always light up with awe, but she never got a response equal to four-year old David's comment. Gently she tucked the stethoscope into his ears and placed the disk over his heart. 'Listen', she said...'What do you suppose that is?' He drew his eyebrows together in a puzzled line and looked up as if lost in the mystery of the strange tap - tap - tapping deep in his chest. Then his face broke out in a wondrous grin and he asked,
'Is that Jesus knocking?' -(is that cute or what?)
My dad sent me one of those "pick an item and scroll down to see what it reveals of you"
Here were the choices :
1. Angel Food Cake
2. Brownies
3. Lemon Meringue Pie
4. Vanilla Cake With Chocolate Icing
5. Strawberry Shortcake
6. Chocolate Cake With Chocolate Icing
7. Ice Cream
8... Carrot Cake
I picked Lemon Meringue Pie, here's what it said about me :
LEMON MERINGUE -- Smooth, sexy, & articulate with your hands, you are an excellent caregiver and a good teacher.(but a slow learner) But don't try to walk and chew gum at the same time.(how very true) A bit of a diva at times,(DIVA? How dare they!) you set your own style because you do your own thing. (that's where being good with my hands comes in - 'doing my own thing') You shine when it comes to helping others and have many friends. (Aside from my comments this is a rather accurate description of yours truly)
True bit : Because I write a lot more letters to a lot more people nowadays, I figured buying a diary would be a good way to remember everything between letters so I could remember what to write about and also not repeat myself. I figure I'll pick a day of the week,probably sundays to do all my writing and just reference to the diary to recall the events of the past week. First entry in the diary? (because I can't resist being a smart-ass- even to myself).
"Dear diary, today I bought a diary"
I crack me up!
I like to buy intelligent pants. I figure that's the best place to put a smart-ass!
Until next time : stay happy,healthy,and safe.
Love you all.
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